Self-esteem is your sense of self-worth. It is defined by Merriam-Webster.com as “a confidence and satisfaction in oneself” or “self-respect” but how does this sense of self-worth occur and how can it be built? More importantly, how does your inner dialogue define your sense of self?
According to Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Woody Schuldt, in his article, The Benefits of Mindfulness, self-reflection and mindfulness are the key. If we can focus on who we are, quiet the chaos and express our thoughts, desires and experiences in a judgment-free medium like journaling, we can hone in on who we are and begin to improve the areas where deficiencies are noticed.
As we begin to discover ourselves, it can help us open up, refreshed, in a whole new way. In order to journal effectively, sometimes the hardest part is getting started. Actually putting pen to paper is first place to start. It may seem easy to get wrapped up in details and to focus on what you should say. By writing down everything that comes to mind, writing in a “stream-of-consciousness style” can be surprisingly easy and it captures the inner dialogue on paper. To make the most of your journaling experience, consider the following tips to get started.
9 Steps To Capture Inner Dialogue While Journaling:
- Write everything. You can always reflect more deeply on what you were thinking in the moment when you review.
- Make mistakes. Because this is designed to be self-reflective, there is not an emphasis on spelling, grammar, sentence construction, etc. and it is more about getting the ideas on paper and letting your thoughts flow and take you from one idea to the next in a fluid motion.
- Don’t edit. Getting the information on the paper is cathartic in and of itself because it allows room for processing through thoughts as you go and the act of penning them and forming them into words makes your interpretation of them more transparent.
- Don’t forget to focus on a balance of positive and negative things equally where possible. We don’t live in a vacuum so to accurately reflect yourself on paper, don’t pretend part of your life doesn’t exist. Life is messy but it is also full of little surprises, happy moments, tearful memories, and powerful emotions – both good and bad and this helps to gain perspective.
- Be truthful to yourself. You are not writing for someone else’s benefit, judgment, or approval. In order for your writing to mean something to you, write in your own voice using idioms and idiosyncratic tendencies that are meaningful in making you who you are and embrace your individualism in your own “voice”.
- Embrace opportunity. Use this activity to think about “what ifs” or consider pros and cons about things you are thinking about trying, new projects you have coming up, or challenges foreseeable in the near future and let that take you in any new direction your mind wanders while you write.
- Consider different formats. Some people find songwriting or poetry to be their prose of choice and others find solace in paragraph form, lists, or drawing. There is no right or wrong way to express yourself.
- Make time. You have thoughts all the time and sometimes they may be deep or sometimes superficial. They might be word associations or memory invoking, life changing events. Spend as much or as little time as needed to capture and delve into these moments. Five minutes or an hour – it’s your call. Fit it into your schedule where you can but don’t feel like it has to be for a set period of time. You might have more to say one day and less another but try to make time at least once a day. On days you have less to say, it is a great time to reflect on past entries to see your thought progression and how much your inner dialogue is changing as you grow and experience life.
- Review at a later time. After writing down your thoughts, consider this a single snapshot in time – where you are at in that particular moment on that particular day. Every time you journal, what you write will be different as we are constantly thinking about new challenges we face, reflecting about new obstacles in our life, and worrying about new personal struggles. Look for whether patterns emerge over time that might require some additional mental attention, i.e. if you notice consistent themes such as work stress or nervousness in specific situations try to reflect on what is making you feel that way and how you can change. Likewise if you notice passions high and favorite topics that excite you, maybe you have hit on something that should be explored more in depth.
Inner dialogue is the conversations that we have with ourselves and it is what we are thinking, feeling, experiencing, or how we interpret each human interaction. Journaling to discover your self-awareness doesn’t have to be complicated. Self-esteem is who you are and journaling is one way to express and be more comfortable with yourself. What better way to express that to yourself than by reflecting on parts of your own life, recognizing how far you have come and what new adventures await with some quiet time, a pen, a notebook and your thoughts. Enjoy getting more acquainted with yourself.